Your sister, Monica, is telling you about her three roommates. It seems none of them will follow the schedule they agreed on for cleaning the kitchen and the bathrooms

Monica has just about had enough—she returned from a weekend away only to find the living room full of empty pizza boxes and beer cans. "I just don't think I can live like this anymore. I can't afford to find another place, but I'm so upset I can't focus on the research paper that's due next week," she complains. Using the skills of empathetic listening, discuss the four techniques and give an example of each that would be an appropriate response to Monica. In addition, explain the expected consequences from using this type of listening with your sister.

The first step of listening with empathy is to understand your partner's feelings. This involves "decentering" yourself, so that you are focused on the other person and his or her feelings rather than on your own feelings or thoughts. If you have experienced exactly the same situation, you might remember the frustrations you felt. At any rate, to help you accomplish this, put aside what you were doing and give her your full attention. The next technique is to ask questions. You might be seeking clarification, more information, or checking to see if your interpretation is clear. You might ask Monica, "Did they tell you about their plans for a party?" "Did they apologize and say they would clean it up?" In addition, you can use paraphrasing. Paraphrasing for content is putting into your own words the information you received. "You said that you came back after being gone for only a weekend?" Also, you may paraphrase emotions. "You sound really at the end of your rope and angry." Using these techniques allows you to clarify any information you might have misunderstood, understand her feelings, allow her to clarify her feelings, communicate to her that you are empathic enough to listen, and help her work through her situation.